Godspeed, My Guy

Don’t ask how, but I recently ended up in a “men are not okay” YouTube rabbit hole.

I’ve been watching this space for a while. (Ask my friends how many headlines I’ve text them with the question: “Are…men OKAY?!”) And, having spent my twenties and early thirties personally victimized by the “Here’s why you don’t have a man” advice industrial complex, I’m glad the fellas are having their moment in the “Here’s what’s wrong with you” sun. Especially when I hear comments from people like Scott Galloway, whose objective is to help men be “emotionally and economically viable for partnership.” DING DING DING. Money is, indeed, a thang.

To a degree, I empathize. I don’t envy learning that 70-80% of “how to be a man” is rooted in subjugating people who are no longer willing to be subjugated. It’s not your fault, but now that the shit won’t fly, it’s very much your problem. Masculinity needs a makeover. And unfortunately for everyone looking for romantic partnership with a man, you can’t knock it out in an hour-long HGTV block.

Gonna be honest. Kinda sucks for all parties involved. Glad I don’t consider myself an interested party.

I suppose I’m passively interested. In an “I’d rather not get raped or murdered by some guy struggling with his place in society” way; not a “HERE’S what I need from you as a man in order to be with you” way.

And certainly not in a “Awwww, the world is so hard on you, here’s some pussy and a pat on the head to get you going” way.

Because a lot of the conversations on “the problem with men” is women not giving as many chances. Apparently, men need chances because they need responsibility because they don’t do well without a sense of purpose and the promise of pussy at the end of the rainbow. And that makes me stabby.

Because that means the centuries of “you’re nobody until some man chooses you” propaganda were a sham, designed to make US desperate to give MEN what THEY need to thrive while settling for their mere presence being a present.

Maybe some of my sistren believe in love enough to build a bridge and get over it. I’m not there. Not when my life is appreciably better without a partner.

So, yeah. For the sake of society (and the whole not getting raped and murdered thing), I want men to be good. But if you ask me what I’ve got on moving that process along?

Good luck and Godspeed, my guy. I’ve got nothin’.

Published by

a girl named rob

I used to be "skinny black girl." I'm now a slender woman on the other side of 35 with no new moniker who is not quite interested in writing under her given name. Still writing my life, a day (or some months) at a time. Also, still black.

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