Freestyle Friday

I came to work to a bottle of Basil Hayden on my desk. Let me just say: I will continue to ignore all advice about the benefits of job-hopping because what I want from an employer are: gifts + minimal stress + little to no encroachment on my personal time. I will be the assistant who sticks with her executive until retirement. Thank you very much.

Want to feel shitty about the future of society?

“An Orwellian world is much easier to recognize, and to oppose, than a Huxleyan,” my father wrote. “Everything in our background has prepared us to know and resist a prison when the gates begin to close around us … [but] who is prepared to take arms against a sea of amusements?”

My dad predicted Trump in 1985—it’s not Orwell, he warned. It’s Brave New World.

My mental cup overfloweth with observations about personal style and archetypes (to the point I debased myself by posting an IG story about it last night).

TL;DR. It is fascinating how feminine I feel in square, boxy shapes I would have ignored before learning about gamine style lines. Take this white shirt…(1)

Conventional wisdom says to tie this oversized shirt (like I did on the left) so my waist doesn’t get lost. It doesn’t look bad. My friend, who is one of the “soft” types in Kibbe’s system, preferred it. Tucked in, it creates a broken, boxy silhouette, giving the look a hint of sharpness that I adore.

Both work, because first and foremost, I am a Gamine and look best when I break up my vertical line. I can pull off the look on the left because I have curves. The look on the right sings because despite having some softness in my bust and hips, my body is frame dominant.

I listen to a lot of podcasts about movies and TV by (charming and delightful) 30 and 40somethings who have…thoughts about the current state of Marvel and Disney properties.

Discussing media that’s at the center of culture is the gig, so I get it. But I wonder if it’s ever occurred to them that they’re just…growing out of PG-13 stories about comic book characters? Yes, they’re made by 30 and 40somethings with sprinkles of adult humor as a wink to the grown ups, but like…

They require suspension of belief. Openness. If a comic book movie or a show about guys with laser swords and the precocious children they protect don’t get you there anymore… perhaps you need to watch series for adults? Get a little HBO Max and FX in your system? That way, you’re not asking stories about super heroes to be the end all, be all.

If this didn’t make you giggle, Idk what to tell you.

I’ve been reading up on Human Design lately. I won’t deep dive in these waters(2), but the Cliff’s Notes on my type (The Generator) confirmed what I’ve been thinking of late. About outgrowing my penchant for intellectualizing and getting more comfortable with noticing and knowing.

Now that I’m paying attention, I see so much confirmation. I’m on the right path.

What I’m Into…

My new favorite wine café. A perfect little hideaway on my commute where I stop for a glass of wine after a long day. Much preferred to buying a bottle and drinking the whole thing on my couch.

Self portraiture. I purchased a 70in tripod for my style experiments and let me tell you. Combined with Google Camera’s Selfie Illumination and Auto Timer? I am getting these flicks. off. I cannot wait to share my latest home photo session on Wordless Wednesday.

YouTube Style Videos. In particular, these two channels: Gabrielle Arruda, a former Project Runway contestant who talks about integrating Kibbe IDs and Style Essences into your personal style; and Frani Matthews, an adorable self-typed Flamboyant Gamine who demonstrates her journey toward self love and body acceptance through personal style.

Monica Murphy’s Wedded Bliss series. As much dark romance as I enjoy, I can’t remember the last time I read something that didn’t disappear into the ocean of Hades/Persephone, dark daddy dom tropes. Books 1-2 of this series explore an arranged marriage of two early twentysomethings from powerful, manipulative, batshit crazy families. And, for a refreshing change, they’re both naïve people pleasers who find their confidence through their sometimes dark and twisty affection for each other. Book 3 is out, but I haven’t read it yet. Let’s hope the author effectively wraps it up.


(1) I’m married to this shirt now. Please address me as “Mrs. Oversized White Shirt.”

(2) I don’t need an additional identifier. Between astrology and Kibbe/Style Essences, ya girl is all “typed” out.

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a girl named rob

I used to be "skinny black girl." I'm now a slender woman on the other side of 35 with no new moniker who is not quite interested in writing under her given name. Still writing my life, a day (or some months) at a time. Also, still black.

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