Freestyle Friday

Photo by Leo Wieling on Unsplash

“Northeast Ohio could see graupel on Thursday.” “What the fuck is “graupel?” you ask (because I definitely fucking asked). According to Fox 8 Cleveland: small soft pellets formed when water droplets freeze onto snow crystal. So, rain and snow? But not hail?

I don’t even know. Just one more reason to slow blink at my newsfeed.

In response to my whinging about not writing this week, I shook up some habits. For starters, I swapped Evernote (my note-taking app of choice) for Simplenote. As part of the Automattic app family, it plays better with WordPress (copying and pasting drafts from Evernote to WP was a nightmare). And its clean interface got my hands moving almost immediately. I loathe how significant seemingly insignificant things (like which app, pen, or notebook I use) are when it comes to inspiration and creativity, but I guess it makes sense. When your relationship gets stale, you switch things up. A new wig. Some role play. A weekend away at a hotel for a change of scenery. A new notetaking app. Same-same.

I’ve completed my first full work week of dressing with the Kibbe method with mostly positive results. For someone with little interest in fashion, I’ve had so much fun shopping my closet for clothing combinations I never would have considered before. It’s like a puzzle, figuring out which pieces go together to emphasize my body’s line and honor my curves.

While I’ve never been a slouch with workwear (plain, yes, but never careless), I’ve rocked previously-ignored blouses and my weekend-only dangling earrings with more confidence this week. And. AND. I’ve taken five minutes to add filling in my brows and using my eyelash curler to my morning routine.

As I told a friend this week, I underestimated how ready I was to see a new version of myself.

Considering my potential return to Instagram at the end of Lent next week and you know what I didn’t miss? Memes. I especially didn’t miss staring blankly, wondering “Why am I the audience for this?” when friends sent them to me expecting a reaction. Let me tell you how it’s felt to not to see a single Slap-gate meme the last two weeks: transcendant.

Here’s an unexpected sentiment for 2022: the new Paul Wall album? Not bad. I came across it after suffering through a woeful collaboration from two rappers I love and was pleasantly surprised by its smooth production. It will sound even better when I can roll my windows down on a sunny day instead of being on the lookout for *checks notes* graupel.

Between his roles in Pam and Tommy and Fresh (where he plays a literal cannibal), my year-long Sebastian Stan crush has officially reached its end. This isn’t moralistic. It’s just hard to keep a man in the spank bank once you’ve seen him a) dress as Tommy Lee and b) consume human flesh. It was fun while it lasted. We’ll always have that golden stretch between Falcon and the Winter Soldier and The 355.

Meanwhile, the trailer for 365 Days: This Day dropped yesterday and MY BODY IS READY. Bring on the problematic romantic tropes! Get into these mafia don and his lady fashions! The gorgeous vistas! THE MAN CANDY! Plot? Who cares?! The real questions: Will anything rival the spreader bar scene from the first movie? Or the infamous spitting during oral that I still can’t believe they put on Netflix alongside Great British Bake-Off episodes?

Live-tweeting that movie during May 2020 was probably my last joyful moment on Twitter. I’ll probably do a live-watch post here to scratch the itch of reacting to all the hilarious, sexy, absurdity in real time.

And that’s all this week. We like “Freestyle Friday” more than “Housekeeping,” yes? It’s giving “R-O-B in the place to be, see. And I got what it takes to roc the mic right…”

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a girl named rob

I used to be "skinny black girl." I'm now a slender woman on the other side of 35 with no new moniker who is not quite interested in writing under her given name. Still writing my life, a day (or some months) at a time. Also, still black.

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